Almost 13 years ago to the day, I flew over 6,000 miles to learn one valuable lesson: a calm life is a strong life.
“And I saw that all toil and achievement spring from one person’s envy of another. This too is meaningless, a chasing after the wind. Fools fold their hands and ruin themselves. Better one handful with tranquility than two handfuls with toil and chasing after the wind.”
-Ecclesiastes 4:6, NIV
A Calm Life is a Strong Life
It was a beautiful, sunny day where the wind was whirling with crisp whispers. I sat down on a carpet of soft, green grass, surrounded by the Bernese Alps. I had to take it all in. Just sixteen days earlier, my husband had surprised me with a 30-day trip to Europe to celebrate twenty-five years of marriage.
Thirty days.
With absolutely no warning, I had to shift an entire month filled with responsibilities and urgent matters. Most women would be overwhelmed with joy, but I found myself overwhelmed with anxiety. What about all my commitments and responsibilities at church? If I don’t attend the summer trainings, I won’t be able to teach or lead any of the women’s events. I must be at that training.
At that time in my life, missing out on anything seemed like messing up on everything.
“I can’t go away for that long,” I said. “What on earth were you thinking?”
My inner panic completely overtook the beauty of my husband’s most generous gift.
“I don’t know,” my husband smiled. “Something overwhelmed me, and I clicked, ‘yes,’ and here we are. It’s twenty-five years. That needs to be celebrated.”
My twenty-something twins were sitting at the table, watching this unfold.
“Mom, you could say, ‘thank you,’” my son spoke. “Really?”
His twin sister sat quietly.
When Nature Invites into a Calm Life
“Women need solitude in order to find again the true essence of themselves.”
-Anne Morrow Lindbergh, Gift from the Sea
With the fresh memory of that conversation in mind, I brushed my hand over the verdant blades of grass, praying softly to God. As I did, I felt something nestled deep in the grass. I pulled it out and held it up to my face. It was a small snail.
As I admired the variegated hues of brown and studied the spiral pattern on its shell, I thought of its simplicity. It reminded me of the beautiful Tiger Moon Shells collected from Cape Hatteras National Seashore.
I turned it round and round and thought of its quiet existence. I couldn’t help but wonder if it was waiting there for me.
For some odd reason, I placed it on the palm of my left hand, reached for my phone, and snapped a simple photo. It spoke to a deep place in my languished soul. I think you have more to say, I thought. Let’s tuck you away and take you home. I have a special place for you on my desk. I want to remember this sacred moment.
In that sacred moment, I recalled the words of my daily devotion, written by the wise Oswald Chambers in his classic, My Utmost for His Highest. They fell on my heart, yet left me hungering to understand why. “Jesus Christ calls service,” he writes, “what we are to Him, not what we do for Him. It is like a corn of wheat, which falls into the ground and dies, but presently it will spring up and alter the whole landscape.”
Alter the Whole Landscape
Little did I know Chamber’s words would become so literal in my life. It seemed my husband’s surprise gift held an even deeper gift. One that I would keep unwrapping.
God was altering the entire landscape of my inner life, inviting me to grasp what it truly means to be a human being, not a human doing.
First and foremost, this trip showed me I don’t want to live the next twenty-five years of my life in the same way as the last twenty-five years. Oh, don’t get me wrong, they have been blessed beyond measure, but the dominant characteristic of these years is my constant state of “over” doing. I concluded I am moving out of “The Land of Over”:
- Overdo
- Overcommit
- Over schedule
- Over-the-top goal setting (unreasonable goals)
- Overeat (binge-eating sweets at night, which typically leads to Candida and Candida infection in my body)
- Overspend on the un-necessities (is this a word?)
- Overachieve (ouch! this one hurts the most)
- Over exercise (yes, it’s all about healthy living and a healthy balance)
- Over analyze (sometimes we must accept the facts/accept in faith)
- Overstep boundaries (know when to speak/not to speak)
A Hyper Life is an Imbalanced Life
Over, in the Greek, means, “hyper.”
Taking that one step further, we see that hyper means, “seriously or obsessively concerned.”
All in all, it just means, “a bit much; a bit out of balance.”
As I held that little snail in the palm of my hand, my eyes were opened to this truth: a hyper life is an imbalanced life.
I come by this personality quirk quite honestly. I was born with a God-given capacity to achieve (we all are) but somewhere along the journey of my life, something clicked inside of me to take residence in “The Land of Over.” That click became the rhythm by which I paced my life.
This drive to do more, be more and have more, diminished my capacity for tranquility.
The great travesty of this imbalanced rhythm is that it played out in very good things. Excelling, at all costs, is what America is all about. In truth, it plays a similar role within the life of the church, as well.
Perhaps I just needed a change of scenery to see my own unhealthy, imbalanced lifestyle.
This break from the rapid routine which I lovingly called my life was a much needed wake up call.
I blame only myself. I claim full responsibility.
Moving Out Day in the Land of Over
When I returned home, I “happened” upon a powerful word in the book of Ecclesiastes.
It reads, “Better one handful with tranquility than two handfuls with toil and chasing after the wind.”
For a long time, I wrestled with fifteen words. I asked, “Wait a minute, Lord, isn’t one handful a cop-out if I am capable of two handfuls? I want to be found faithful stewarding the talents you have given me.”
And then, I heard his still small voice say, “My daughter, a calm life is a strong life.”
Today, step outside for a few moments.
Maybe stand barefoot in a patch of lush, verdant grass.
Hold out your two hands before you.
Look at them with tender care.
Consider and meditate on Ecclesiastes 4:6.
Speak this breath prayer aloud:
Lord, may I learn that a calm life is a strong life.
Help me release toil and chasing after the wind. Amen.
Author Bio
Janell Rardon, aka Professional Heartlifter, is the author of Stronger Every Day: 9 Tools for an Emotionally Healthy You,” and is the host of “Today’s Heartlift with Janell,” a podcast dedicated to integrating faith and mental health. Be sure to grab your free resources and goodies at www.janellrardon.com.