Are you tired of feeling old, or just plain tired?
I turned 63 this year. The sixties have been an interesting decade thus far. Different things make me happy than previous decades. I am finding more in the moments than the momentous. Doing is now balanced with being. Dressing up is less important than finally finding the perfect pajamas.
Having my first book published and writing has revealed a creative side to my career. I have several friends my age who have also discovered their love of creativity. Raising young children was replaced with painting, writing, gardening, or new careers chosen out of love and not out of need.
I spent nearly three years of not walking without a cane, crutches, or in a wheelchair during my late fifties. I was determined to change that trajectory. It began with a goal of bench pressing the equivalent of my weight and ended with the state powerlifting championship. My legs were less functional, but my arms and chest worked just fine. Now, I can compete in squatting and deadlifting as well. It helped me physically but also was what I needed mentally.
I’m happy that 65 is two years away, and I will finally qualify for Medicare, which means no more large insurance premiums. I could not have imagined to be excited about Medicare, but if you’re around my age, I imagine you relate.
Yes, life in your sixties is still life, but different.
I remember turning thirty as if it were yesterday. I don’t remember it fondly. I remember it because it was my worst birthday. We had just moved across country and being new to the area had no friends to celebrate the turning of a decade. So, we thought we would try something different by visiting a small beachside amusement park.
We walked around eating hotdogs, then funnel cakes, and cotton candy. It was quite a mistake to then jump on a wooden roller coaster that went clickity clack as it bounced back and forth struggling up the steep inclines. When we gratefully stepped off, my husband, Scott, and I both felt like we would barf (I know, not a medical term but the most appropriate word that came to mind.)
We made our way to the exit but decided to stop at the “Let me guess your age” booth. Wrong move!
“Let me see ma’am. If I guess within three years of your actual age, I win. If I don’t, you get to pick from this great selection of prizes.”
“Okay”, I thought. “I don’t really need a prize, but it would be interesting to see how close he came now that I am in my thirties.”
“So”, he said as he rubbed his hands together looking at me intently. “I believe you are a very young looking 37.”
I don’t even have to write the rest of the story, you get it. Worst birthday ever!
So now at 63, I can reflect with laughter. I was so dramatic about it at the time. But I am a bit older, and a thirty-year-old woman might see me as old. But what is crazy, I feel younger than I felt on that day. Don’t get me wrong, there are days when my body feels old, but I don’t feel old. I don’t take a magic supplement or practice healthy eating all the time. I wish I had the willpower for a perfect healthy lifestyle, but I am in the camp of practice, practice, practice.
I believe what became my superpower and my fountain of youth was becoming an avid learner. My patients over decades of practice were my professors of life, and their stories were often drenched in wisdom. Wisdom is only valuable with application to our own lives and sharing it with others. I am practicing the application, but let me share it with you for you to consider.
Seven Ways to Not Feel Old
I’ll begin with what “not feeling old” is not about.
It’s not about denying your age. It’s not about Botox, CrossFit, or chasing trends that don’t fit who you are anymore. It’s not about pretending your knees don’t creak when you get out of bed or that you don’t need to hold the menu a little farther away to read it.
Not feeling old has far less to do with your body—and far more to do with your mind and spirit.
I’ve sat with patients who were well into their nineties but still had a twinkle in their eye, curiosity in their hearts, and stories they couldn’t wait to tell. I’ve also cared for people twenty years younger who had given up on living long before their bodies gave out. What is the difference? It wasn’t age or even health status—it was mindset and soul health.
So how do we stop feeling old?
Stay curious
Curiosity is one of the greatest antidotes to aging. Curiosity may have killed the cat, but it is the antidote to a dormant, aging brain. When we choose to remain curious, we activate new areas of our brain. Curiosity leads to exploring our world, learning new skills, and sharpening the ones we may have had and lost. When we stop being curious, we stop learning. The world becomes smaller, and so does our brains. This leads to activating neuroplasticity. Neuroplasticity is the brain’s ability to create new neural pathways and strengthen those that exist.
When we activate neuroplasticity by remaining curious, we can diminish age related changes in our brain. With each new skill we learn, the easier it is to learn the next new skill. We can improve our existing cognitive capabilities. Wouldn’t it be nice to eradicate brain fog? We can heal our brains and improve brain fitness. It improves recovery from previous strokes and traumatic brain injuries.
Invest in people of every age Life giving moments occur when we practice generational generosity. Mentor someone younger or learn from someone older. Don’t let your circle grow narrow with age. Expand it. You can be the bridge between generations. Let the young ignite your energy and the older (not old) fuel you with wisdom.
Live with purpose:
When you wake up in the morning, do you know why? If your reason to get out of bed is only tied to your productivity or obligations, you’ll start to feel old when those fade. But when you anchor your life in purpose—serving, loving, creating, and encouraging—you’ll find that the flame inside stays lit, even if your body slows down.
Laugh—often
There’s nothing youthful about taking life too seriously. Laugh at yourself. Find the humor in the ordinary. Laughter releases endorphins, relieves stress, and reminds us not to grip life too tightly. One of my favorite aspects of social media is watching funny animal videos. I know it sounds immature, but isn’t that the point, to stop being so mature.
Shift your focus from decline to gratitude
Don’t focus on what you have lost with time, but rather appreciate what you have gained with gratefulness. Gratitude keeps us grounded in what’s good and meaningful. God’s enormous grace should keep us in a posture of humble thankfulness.
Face your fears
Fear can paralyze us or lead to depression and generalized anxiety. Fear of aging is common and compounds with time. Every individual is different, but the core of this fear is driven by the thought of losing our autonomy. I have witnessed the devastating effects of patients desperately clinging to their autonomy to their own detriment. It has taught me a lot.
Autonomy matters greatly, and the only way to keep it longer is to plan for a time when you may lose it. Planning for your finances, your health, your living circumstances, your end—of-life care, and your legacy will help you create realistic goals and strategies to achieve them. Without a plan, chaos will ensue at some future date. Chaos makes everyone feel out of control and autonomy will be lost.
Anticipate your day
We each make a subliminal choice when we wake up. We either dread our day or look forward to it. When we choose to anticipate our day with positive emotions, we stimulate three areas of our brain that makes us feel better. The practice of positive anticipatory feelings creates a feedback loop between our mind, body, and spirit that can create a sense of youthfulness even as decades turn.
Good habits are not learned in a day, but with practice, practice, practice we can live today with wonder and look forward with expectation. May we laugh, learn, mentor, pray, have courage, and wake up each day with a soul still wide awake. Then we will age, but not grow stale, become older; but never old.
Author Bio
Dr. Pamela Prince Pyle is a Board-Certified Internal Medicine physician, Board of Director for Africa New Life Ministries in Rwanda, Museum of the Bible Woman of Legacy, speaker, and best-selling Author of Anticipating Heaven: Spiritual Comfort and Practical Wisdom for Life’s Final Chapters, published by Thomas Nelson 2025.
She speaks and writes nationally and internationally on the topics of evangelism, women’s discipleship, healthcare, health equity, and end-of-life care. She has been a featured speaker at the National Prayer Breakfast and the Refresh Women Global Conference.
Her website, www.drpamela.com, is a resource for navigating the foreign world of healthcare by uniting faith and medicine with hope.