The holiday season is here, and our minds are filled with holiday to-do’s. We want a calm mental and spiritual mindset that embraces each moment filled with inner peace, but we do not want to miss one detail. We want to do everything in our power to make this holiday season special.
Why do we twist ourselves into perfectly shaped pretzels and attempt each year to professionally curate our family’s celebration? Is it because we simply must post stunning photos of our homes and lives for likes on social media? Or does the reason go deeper? Have we ever taken time to listen to our hearts or asked family members how they would like to celebrate? Have we asked God what His ideal holiday for us would look like?
I hate to admit it, but I have prayed about many things without asking God for direction regarding our holidays. I think I’ve got it covered. Maybe I even think that God will bless my holiday plans because I love Him and spend time with Him every day. Surely, He would want to bless my marvelous party plans. Right?
This morning, when I took time to ask, I sensed a new beginning springing up in my heart. A different idea of holiday celebration began to stir in my soul. As I pondered this transformation, I received a small taste of God’s gift of peace. Suddenly I realized I was onto something very good. So, I searched the scriptures, prayed, and called our grown daughters to ask what was most important to them and their families this year.
Here are the five things I heard from them and sensed from God:
1. “Be still and know that I am God” (Ps. 46:10)
This often-quoted Bible verse seems to get lost between the prophetic promises of God in the Old Testament and the fulfillment of those promises thru Christ in the New Testament. What the psalmist wrote, however, in this verse contains the power to always fill us with peace. The verse calls us to rest in God, trust in Him, and cease striving.
I think we can all attest to how weary we feel when we spend too much time and money designing a dazzling holiday. Wouldn’t it be wonderful to scale back and trust God to bring supernatural joy and peace to our time together? Would it not bless us, and our families, if we are rested and happily hosting the family dinner? I think others can tell when our hearts are hurried, and our hospitality is forced.
Perhaps this year is the perfect time to try a new thing, to find our own personal peace and practice gratitude in the midst of this busy season. Stores are stocked with beautiful journals that are just the right size for jotting a holiday gratitude list. This one small practice each day of writing five things we are grateful for can change our entire perspective and open our eyes to God’s wonderful ways and his presence and peace in us and in the lives of those around us.
2. How Much Giving is Too Much?
Does your living room resemble a department store filled with red and green presents stacked three feet high? Are the stockings hung by the fire overflowing? Believe me, I am not judging anyone in this area. Years ago, I overdid the gift buying so much that we barely had room for seven of us to sit near the Christmas tree to open gifts. I had purchased so many “stocking stuffers” that there were small stacks of three to five additional gifts under each stocking. And the kids’ stockings were not small. What was I thinking? Opening presents that year required a brunch break because several hours of nonstop ribbon cutting and package opening were too much and honestly not all that fun.
The following year, we created a three-gift policy. The Bible shares that Jesus received gold, frankincense, and myrrh after his birth. We figured if three gifts were perfect for our Lord, the same amount would bless our children as well. Each child or grandchild is also treated to a full stocking, but no longer overflowing onto the floor. This policy has saved us time, effort, and money. And our children and grandchildren are just as excited about their gifts as when they received much more. Toss in a few homemade gifts and you have gotten yourself a unique, meaningful Merry Christmas. A simple search online revealed that we are not the only ones who think this way. This is an eye-opening article you’ll want to read: The Real Cost of Christmas: How Much Do People Spend on Gifts? Perhaps less truly is more.
3. Made From Scratch or Made by Someone Else?
I applaud every woman who loves to cook and does it well. But women like me who would rather read books and take long walks struggle with holiday cooking because we are just not good at it, and we do not really enjoy the process all that much. Oh, I tried to prepare the menu in advance, purchase the groceries, and even pour the egg casserole into the pan the night before to save time on Christmas day. The refrigerator was stuffed with ham and all the trimmings. And a large glass bowl containing my great-grandmother’s sugar cookie dough, ready to bake and decorate, was waiting to be rolled and cut with the holiday cookie cutters I had inherited from my mother.
Imagine my surprise when no one wanted to help! Even the grandchildren wanted to watch Christmas movies or play games in the living room while I baked and decorated four dozen Christmas trees, reindeer, candy canes, and stars. It was a lonely day in the kitchen that Christmas, but I learned a valuable lesson. People love to eat the delicious treats we bake (or buy), but we are likely the only ones who appreciate the loved ones who enjoyed the same recipes for generations.
To ease your mind and keep you in the middle of holiday fun, I recommend you bake those special cookies in advance and freeze them. Put your feet up before the family arrives and give yourself permission to rest. They are going to enjoy whatever you serve because you serve it with love. It does not matter how fancy the food is or how much time it took you to prepare. Bob Evans makes a tasty holiday dinner. I am sure many other restaurants do too. Give yourself a break. Take a deep breath. And know that as long as they don’t go hungry, your family will be fine. If you are one of many women who live to cook and bake, and dare I say clean-up, go for it. Do what makes you happy because a happy “you” brings joy to everyone around you.
4. Wrap for “Wow” or Bless with Less?
Are you a custom gift wrapper who designs packages to suit the receiver’s interests or taste? Or are you a gift bag giver who stuffs a few pieces of festive holiday tissue paper into each bag to hide what is inside? Each year, I see gorgeous packages on social media and in holiday magazines that inspire me to consider customizing a few gifts of my own. Then, as Christmas draws near, I end up at the CVS counter with a 3-pack of holiday wrapping paper and scurry to finish the gift wrapping before the sun comes up on Christmas morning. I felt a bit guilty about that for a few years. I know I am capable of wrapping presents like people on Instagram and other social media platforms; but I just do not seem to get it done.
A couple of years ago, two of our daughters came home with bags full of gifts and thick, festive, plaid wrapping paper with velvet ribbon and large holiday bows. They wrapped the most beautiful packages I believe I have ever seen. Comparing their wrapping skills to mine surprisingly did not cause me to feel like I had failed. On the contrary. It was fun to compliment the girls and allow them to shine as each recipient appreciated the gorgeous packaging and admired their work before gently removing the ribbon to discover what was inside.
If you have adult children, friends, or neighbors who excel at wrapping exquisite gifts, applaud their talent and thank them for taking so much time to bless you in such a special way. Then lovingly offer what you can, knowing that the most important gift to give is you. The simplest gift wrapped in plain brown paper with a single red ribbon can mean the world to the one who receives it. And if you use CVS wrapping paper like I do, trust that when the paper is tossed in the trash, all that remains is the gift and the gratitude of the one who received it. If you decide you simply must wrap gorgeous gifts, check out one of these articles: 11 Christmas Wrapping Hacks to Make Presents Less of a Chore – Cupcakes and Cutlery and 71 Christmas Wrapping Ideas That Will Wow – The Heathered Nest. Whatever you choose, have fun because laughter truly is a good medicine for any healthy lifestyle.
5. Stage a Quiet Space of Your Own.
Finally, and perhaps most important, if you are hosting the family for the holidays and all your rooms will be filled with people, blow-up mattresses, and suitcases of all shapes and sizes; remember to prepare a still, small place for yourself to be at peace, if only for a few moments at the start of each day. Typically, I begin each day by lighting a candle I made myself at a local Candle Lab. Then, I read a devotional from Jesus Calling and pray before reading my Bible. I am one of those people who can get lost in the Word of God for a long time. Obviously, during the holidays, you need to watch the clock, but do take special care of your heart, mind, soul, and spirit. Be sure that the books and items that set a peaceful mood for you are gathered in advance in a special place where you know you will not be interrupted.
Beth Moore said, “How often we expect big things from God without preparing for big things from him.” I would say that holiday gatherings qualify as big things, and I’m guessing we all want inner peace, love, and joy to fill our hearts and homes during this special time of the year. Depending on your family, that alone could be considered a nearly impossible thing. But if we want God to grant big things and answer big prayers, it’s important we spend time with him each day, especially throughout the holiday season. We need to treat our relationship with him like the most important friendship we have. And when we seek him with all our heart, and pray over our holiday gatherings, we can be sure he hears and will be faithful to fill us with peace because he loves us more than we know.
In the stillness of each morning, allow your devotion to him to bring you peace of mind and mental and spiritual wellness. A woman who brings light and love to those around her, even in the most challenging circumstances, is a woman to be praised. To your family, you are that woman if you remember what matters most. Allow God through the Holy Spirit to fill you each day this holiday season so you have more than enough to gift to everyone you love. That is the most precious gift of all.
Author Bio:
Donna Wyland is an award-winning author and writing coach. Her picture books, ‘Twas the Night Before Jesus and Psalms in Rhyme for Little Hearts are Readers’ Choice Award Finalists and Psalms in Rhyme won the Christian Indie Award for picture books in 2024. Her newest adult title, The Last Best Year–A Simple Guide to a Grateful Life, will be released in Spring 2025. Donna’s books, blogs, podcasts, and newsletter are available at www.donnawyland.com.